Sale e Pepe: December 2012

Have you ever listened to Martha Stewart and thought, "yeah, I can do that!'
Me neither.

But the other day I was listening to a Wait, Wait Don't Tell Me podcast where she was the special guest they invited on to answer questions about things she knows nothing about.
She answered all three questions wrong, so the unfortunate listener she was playing for will NOT have Karl Casell's voice as her outgoing message on her voicemail.
This, I found incredibly satisfying.
Don't judge me.

She did, however, mention a thing or two about pomegranates.
She described the idiot proof way of releasing the seeds from the fruit without making an iota of a mess.
You basically score the fruit into quarters, hold one piece upside down over a bowl and then WHACK the snot out of it with a wooden spoon.
This is something I can do.

and so I tried.

Either I scored the fruit in the incorrect, non-Stewart manner OR maybe my wooden spoon was made of non-Martha approved wood. In any event, I made a terrible, mess.
An absurd, 'Um, Honey....Did someone get murdered here??!!'
mess.
Thus proving that idiot proof is really more of a suggestion than an actual truth.

After all that scoring and whacking I had:
a bruised thumb
a stained shirt
a nasty cramp in my right hand,
and slightly lower self esteem.

So, I did what anyone in my situation would do: I gathered up the ~~victims~~ seeds as best I could and made myself
a cocktail.